October 17, 2015

Seriously guys, being a mama is HARD!

So, having a baby is tough.  First you have to grow the kid.  Then you have to give birth to him. Those two things in of themselves are hard and time consuming and you'd think the hardest part of it all, right? Nope. Then you have to care for this little person.  This little person who can't communicate with you except for screaming, crying, flailing and wailing. This is not the most effective way of communication, especially if you are sleep deprived. You know how people say you can tell the difference between the cries. Bologna! After a certain point, screaming is screaming.  And when it's 2AM and he's screaming for the 4th time since going to bed all you can think is "Dear God, WHHHHYYYYY???"


Well, at least we have an answer for our why.  Remember how I said that James had been eating every 2 hours for the last few weeks, even at night, with very little rests in between? Poor kid. He had a doctors appointment Thursday and it turns out he's not grown in length or gained much weight since his last visit 2 months ago.  No seriously. He has grown in length only about 1/4 inch or less in 2 months. That's not good. So for the most part, he's not been getting enough nutrition to make him grow; it's just been maintaining him really. The good doc feels that my messed up gallbladder is a likely culprit of me not being able to get enough nutrients and therefor James not getting enough either.  And the fact that I've been having a hard time eating enough doesn't help either.  So I feel like I've been starving my poor kid even though I've done everything I can to produce more milk. Fenugreek, oatmeal, water (SO much water), eating, eating, eating.  The only way I produce enough for him is if he gives me enough time in between feeds which isn't happening so well at the moment. 


Two nights ago we gave him his first formula bottle before bed.  He looked at it a little side-ways after the first sip but then horked it down with his usual gusto. He has always been a hearty eater so hopefully with the extra food he'll be getting he'll start to get porky soon.  Hopefully he'll love the solids as well. I think we may give that a try tomorrow-I'm thinking sweet potatoes or avocado.  I'll definitely try to get some photos of that since it's guaranteed that he will be making some funny faces; either of love and delight or hate.  Any way you look at it, it proves to be hilarious.


I know I don't ask often but if you think of it, please keep James in your prayers. Healthy eating and sleep is the name of the game for him. And bonus, the better he sleeps, the better is sleep which makes me a happy mama ;)

October 10, 2015

Phew.....

So I'm a little angry at blogger at the moment.  I had written one post, waited to long to post it, scratched it, wrote another heartfelt one, only to find out it didn't save or publish. Boo. So here I am attempting again.




I know say things get hectic rather often in the beginning of my posts when I haven't written anything in a while but this time it's true!! Really really true!! Life with a baby is kind of crazy. I knew things would be different but in the way they are has surprised me in some ways.
I knew that I wouldn't sleep much to begin with but I didn't expect breastfeeding would be so tough. In shows, movies, books, and other people's stories, breastfeeding is depicted as this beautiful, simple, and sweet thing between a mom and her baby. Picture lots of cooing, cuddling, and all around love and happiness.






Now cut to me, 3am, and me wincing and crying because it's been 6+ weeks of this nightmare of breastfeeding and it still hurts like crazy.  They (meaning the experts) say if it still hurts after 2 weeks seek help. Sometimes it takes longer to work things out. Let me tell you a little secret (which is totally not a secret!)-6 weeks is too long! At this said 3am wincing fit, I googled "why does it still hurt to breastfeed after 6 weeks." No joke.  Oh the things that pop up! But the one helpful thing that did show up was that there was a possibility of James having a tongue tie. So off to boob group, aka, lactation consultation mom's group at the hospital, I go.  There the lactation consultant confirms that he does have a slight tongue tie and a high pallet. Those two factors made it tough for him to latch on properly and to suck. Oh joy.  Happily, after that talk and some new techniques we were on a better road. Now, he eats quickly and efficiently.






With one problem figured out another arises-typical eh?  After another few weeks I noticed he wasn't super happy to be laid on his back, especially after eating.  He was also spitting up more, fairly gassy, and some other things.  So after a few nights of blood curdling screaming, I called the dr.  Sadly it was a Friday and I didn't get to talk to anyone so I had to wait the weekend to call back Monday and after calling 3 more times, I finally get to talk to the nurse. After explaining what was going on, she tells me she's going to chat with the pediatrician (who we LOVE!) and get back to me. When she calls back she confirmed my suspicions-James was showing signs of having reflux AND an aversion to dairy. So on meds he goes and no more dairy for me.  Now, as you know, I LOVE dairy.  I actually don't feel that love is an adequate enough word for my feelings when it comes to dairy.  Ice cream. Chesse. Creams. Butter. The list goes on and on.  Being dairy free has become a great challenge in my life but he's totally worth it.




The latest in the health saga is I had emergency gallbladder surgery 2.5 weeks ago.  I was having these "episodes" in which I was in terrible, awful pain in my back, around my ribcage on both sides, and into my sternum.  Apparently that is classic gallbladder issues. Good to know. I had a few of these "episodes" since James was 4-6 weeks ago. The last time it happened it lasted so long and I couldn't get any sleep that Matt took me into the urgent care where they promptly told me they couldn't help me and they had no idea what was wrong with me.  Go to the ER they said. So off to the ER we went. There, they immediately drew blood, took urine, and ordered an ultrasound where it was confirmed that I had gallstones. Off to an MRI to make sure they weren't in the ducts. We also spoke to a surgeon who said it was better to take it out sooner than later and since the OR was free that night why not give it a go.  Matt and I looked at each other and said since we're already here might as well.  It didn't give me enough time to freak out and stew on it so I think I handled it pretty well. Recovery was quick and relatively painless. They did the procedure laparoscopicly so I have a few small scars on my belly but other than that not too worse for wear. I need to be on a low fat diet for a little while so my body can adjust but other than that I'll be just fine.




Parenting is hard work. Especially if God blesses you with a kid who doesn't think sleep is important, like mine. I have no idea how I grew a person who fights sleep so much-I freakin' love sleep! So does Matt.  We had almost a week of eating every two hours (yay growth spurts and developmental leaps!) which meant I was getting like an hour or so of sleep.  I am not a pleasant gal to be around with so little sleep. My husband is a saint for helping me out and putting up with me.  We decided to put James on a schedule a few days ago because the demand feeding thing was not working out well for us.  It's been a tough few days but his night sleep is getting better! He is definitely a sleep begets sleep kind of kid so the better he does in the day, the better we are at night.  Fingers crossed and lots of prayers that he keeps it up!






Now on a much happier side, James is freaking adorable. He is so smiley, on the verge of giggling and rolling over, and is just a happy dude. He loves his daddy and his puppy (aka Samson) so much. But, I'm still his favorite for the time being.





We took him to the pool over labor day for the first time and it was hilarious. He doesn't like to be cold so the chilly pool water was not his forte.  He's been a little clingy at times the last few weeks, I call him a clinging monkey when he does it. With those big (probably) brown eyes peaking up around the world, he looks like a little monkey clinging to his mama, minus the red hair!  I joked with Matt that I suspect our child will be much like his daddy-a slow introduction to new things and lots of time to think it over! After he got over the initial cold shock, he seemed to warm up to the idea of being in the pool. I'm thinking we're going to have a water baby next summer.






In horsey news, things are rolling full steam ahead around here. The arena is 90% complete-it just needs fencing around it and we're done! Rui now how has his own paddock so he's not living in the round pen anymore. I don't know who is more pleased-me or him! Matt started barn construction this weekend and I am STOKED!!! It's going to be amazing!!! It definitely is a labor of love from him to me, as James was mine ;) I'm working on taking pictures so we can see the process all along the way. I am so, so, so thankful for the man I married and all of our friends and family who are helping out.  Lots of guys are wanting to help out and be manly ;)

July 26, 2015

Alex Paige, Wonder Photographer Extrodinaire!

So once again Alex went above and beyond awesome in capturing our family! She came to our home to snap some pictures of newly born James. Thankfully he was nice and sleepy so he was pretty agreeable for the most part-towards the end he was ready to chow down.  Alex did such a wonderful job getting shots of our sweet little guy and of us just being with him, and our fur boys too! As usual, we were all laughing and having a nice time just chatting.  It's amazing to see how much he has changed between those very first pictures and what Alex took at 3 weeks old. Thank you so much Alex for doing such a beautiful job-I think you may have become the official Moritz family photographer!



We're finally starting to adjust to what the new normal will be like. The first few weeks were a little rough-James was not a big fan of sleeping. It seems as though the last week he's figured out that sleep is a good thing for him, and especially for mama! When he's awake he's usually a fairly happy guy, giving me some smiles (the first ones were glorious and so stinkin' cute!, poor Matt has yet to see one.) but no giggles yet.  He's proving to be fairly easy to calm down most of the time and he just loves to lay and wiggle on his changing table, it's hilarious! We're not sure what it is about the table and the wall by it that he loves so much but we're happy we can put him down for a while and get some stuff done sometimes. Matt has taken to being a daddy so well-it's lovely to see and be a part of! We just love our little Critter so very much!

July 2, 2015

Hello, My Name Is.....

So as you all can tell, I've been rather quiet these last few weeks.  Well, I've got a super legit reason for this. Critter made a grand entrance into the world on June 15.  Ok, last chance to guess if Critter is a boy or girl....did you guess? It should come as no surprise that Critter is a little boy!! We have named him James Curtis and he couldn't be more amazing! God really did bless us with this little guy! He has been pretty awesome so far.  He came 3 days early and was 7 pounds 12 ounces, 20 inches long (according to hospital stats.  At the pediatrician's he was 18.9 inches long and 7 pounds 4 ounces (this was 3 days after birth, they always lose a little weight so that was expected) so not quite as long as the hospital said.) 

Now I said I would be honest and real about baby life on here so I'm going to share some of the birth with you all.  Don't worry, I won't go into too much detail ;)  Basically my water broke first, with no contractions happening before hand; it was intense from the beginning. With no fluids in there, there was no cushion for him to float around in so contractions were really tough.  And they started out three minutes apart. So I really didn't get eased into labor, lucky me! We only stayed home a few hours because with the contractions being so close together we were unsure if I was going to actually have him rather quickly. 

When we got to the hospital (at about 1 am), the midwife checked me and I was only 3 cm dilated-so not much. So we settled in for what was looking to be a long night.  As time went on, the contractions were growing in intensity and were getting closer together, about 2-3 minutes apart.  Along with the intensity I also had back labor (oh so fun) and lots of pressure, downtown. We'll just leave it at that. After being checked again at about 7 or 8 am, I wasn't dilated much more so I asked for an epidural.  As much as I didn't want to have one, I'm so glad that I did! As soon as the doc shot me up, relief.  I could finally sleep! And stop convulsing-I didn't know that was something that could happen in labor. Apparently hormones and pain can make you shake uncontrollably.

After the epidural I slept, for several hours.  That rest made all the difference. I awoke to being almost ready to push.  James just needed to get a little further south and we were good to go. So in those 2 hours before it was time to push, Matt and I just chatted and rested, preparing as best we could that we were about to have a baby. I realize now that nothing can prepare you for this-maybe physically I was prepared but mentally it still hadn't hit me. 

Now when it  came time to push, we found out why I was having so much pressure downtown; James was "sunny side up," meaning his face was up and the back of his head was against my pelvis and spine.  So our lovely midwife looked at me and said "ok, you're probably going to have to push longer than an hour because of the epidural and that he's sunny side up. Those two factors make it a lot harder work. Are you ready?" I was and was not at the same time but said let's do this.

So there we were, Matt holding a leg and being so encouraging. The midwife talking me through it all and letting me know what was going on.  And worship music playing the whole time, helping to keep my focus on the task at hand, and to keep me in a prayerful mindset as well.  It was so cool really.  The nurse working asked about my play list, if it was on Pandora or if it was one I had made (I made a sweet list for my ipod which everyone loved).  To have both the midwife and nurse humming and singing along with the worship songs was such a blessing.  In the midst of this terribly physically grueling task, we were all so calm and focused, casually chatting in between contractions/pushing.  The next day that same, awesome, nurse said that ours was one of the most peaceful births she had ever helped with.  That we were so calm, and with the worship music, it was nice to be part of.  I feel like there is no higher compliment that can be made-and it's all because the Lord was with us the whole time. 

So after only one hour of pushing, James came into our lives.  Now you know how Matt and I are; we're not the most emotional of folks.  But my beloved, sweet husband hugged and kissed me with tears in his eyes, thanking Jesus for our little guy and his safe arrival.  Me? I was in shock. When they put James on my chest, I just looked at Matt and said holy crap. I couldn't really believe that I had a kiddo to love and care for. I know, I had 9 months to prepare for that moment. But nothing prepares you for actually holding and seeing this life for the first time.  It was very surreal.  Even now, two weeks later, I look at him and think, holy crap, I've got this little one to care for.

Now I had been told by several ladies that giving birth is like the most satisfying poo you'll ever take in your life.  I don't know what kinds of poos they have but that is not what I would liken the experience to! It was very relieving to get him out that's for sure!  Apparently the fact that it only took an hour to shove him out was rather impressive as well.  The midwife and all the nurses told me that it was a sort of accomplishment. I chock it up to all the hard work I had been doing the whole pregnancy. That. And the fact that I am a beast and really didn't want to have to work longer than necessary.

The funniest part of this whole experience is when I passed out on the toilet.  Yes, I really did! Apparently this is also common.  After the epidural wore off and we were getting ready to shift over to the recovery room, the nurses said ok let's get up, have you pee and change.  As I stood up, I felt all my guts start to tumble and fall back into place.  This is a weird feeling.  It's like that sinking feeling you get in your stomach when it lurches after a big hill or roller coaster, but on every kind of crack, speed, dope, and upper you could possibly think of. In truth it made me a little nauseated. But I soldiered on.  We slowly get to the potty where I was stripped down to being naked as a jay bird, sit down, and get light headed, which I tell the nurse.  She then gets some smelling salts and wafts it under my nose.  Now for a person who is terribly sensitive to smells and such, this was torture.  I've never done drugs but I imagine that the sensation I felt must compare to that first hit of some good smack, immediate and mind numbing.  I know it's supposed to shock you back into reality but it just made my head explode.  So I told her, "that made it worse!" What does she do? Wafts it again!! Next thing I know, I've got three faces staring at me asking "are you ok?" Of course my response is "why wouldn't I be ok?" "You passed out." Oh.  Well then. Mind you, I'm still naked as can be but now have a larger audience.  There's nothing like waking up butt naked to complete strangers.  And there was Matt, peaking around the door, checking to make sure I'm ok. He lasted there just a few minutes before going to back James who was also getting cleaned up.  The funny thing is I didn't know I had passed out because I still heard music playing in my head so I didn't think anything of it. People had told me that any modesty you have goes out the window when you have a baby-you don't care who sees what so long as that thing gets out of you.  Not me. I was still very aware of the fact that more people than I cared to count were witnessing me so unbearably vulnerable that I was still shy about it.  I'm a modest gal. Having a baby really didn't change that much.  

So we got over to the other side and recovered just fine after that.  Matt took to being a daddy like a pro and changed the diapers like he had been doing it his whole life.  Now, he thinks I'm crazy (what else is new?) but I say he has a new daddy glow about it. You know how sometimes people look different after they get married, or women get a glow in pregnancy? He got this new look about him as soon as he started to hold his little boy.  Pride. Love. Accomplishment. Purpose. I'm sure all of these things and more contribute to this new look he has.  See for yourself.....


 
I'm pretty sure I'm saying "hey buddy! Thanks for coming out of me!!"

 
Such a cutie!


Welcome home little boy!!

 

 
In the onsie my friend Amanda helped me embroider. He's laying on the same blanket that Matt was brought home in from the hospital.

 
Such a proud daddy!

 
He's pretty snugly after eating.


 
First bath. Samson LOVES James so much!! He is fairly protective over James, always watching. And giving kisses. 

 
Mama snuggles after the bath.

 
 
We're settling into this parenting thing alright for the time being.  We'll see how the next few weeks, months, and years go ;)

May 28, 2015

Click click!

So earlier in the month we had some maternity photos done.  Now you all know us, we're not normally formal photo kinds of folk.  However, my dear auntie kept asking for belly shots (which I was hesitant to take) and once Matt and I started talking about it we thought, well, why not? After asking around we decided on Alex Paige Photography (http://www.alexpaigephotography.com/)-she came highly recommended and she did not disappoint!! We took the boys along as well (since they are so stinkin' pretty!) and got some amazing shots! Critter is already super photogenic! Just like his/her daddy ;) Happily, Alex has agreed to come back once Critter makes its grand entrance into the world for some newborn shots. We had a beautiful evening down at St. Mary's City for this shoot and I am beyond thrilled at how great these photos came out.  She's made pregnancy look good on me! I would HIGHLY recommend Alex if you're looking for any photos to be done; she's very professional, engaging, works to no end to make sure the shot is right (always following the light!) and is a very reasonable price.  Thanks again Alex for such a lovely time and photos! Can't wait for newborn Critter shots!!
 

















My handsome and goofy hubby!!



May 27, 2015

I Know I've Dropped the Ball!

So I realize it's been a while since the last post.  When we last left off we were just hitting 9 weeks left in our countdown.  We are now at 3 weeks. That's right. 3. How did this happen??? Where did the time go?? Well we did have 1 week in Florida for a vacation which was awesome and went way too fast. Here are just a few shots of the fun!
Bok Tower Garden
 


 
Kennedy Space Center-Space shuttle Atlantis

 
A nature reserve, complete with gators!

 
Tampa Aquarium-petting the sting rays

 
 
We've also had all sorts of excitement around the home front.  Mom's horse Asher got tangled in the fence and had to be taken to the emergency vet hospital in VA 2 hours away. Don't worry, he's ok.  Just needed some stitches and stall rest for about a month, no big deal right?


S & S had their baby about 3 weeks ago-right on her due date! Baby H made HIS grand entrance after much speculation as to whether or not he was a girl or boy.  So now we have 4 brothers, 3 have had a kid, which translates to 3 boys thus far.  Any guesses as to what Critter will be?? The odds are (not??) in our favor. There was much hope that Sarah would be the one to pop out a girl from both families (hers and the M family) so I don't know how much hope is being placed on ours to be a girl.  No one really talks about it and I don't know of it's because they either a: don't care at this point (because all the hype was about what H was going to be and no one thought/cared much about ours) b: are afraid to jinx it by talking about it or c: have resigned themselves to the fact that we will probably be having a boy as well. From the beginning it was guessed S would have the girl and I the boy so I don't know. My folks have been saying from the beginning that we're having a girl so we've gotten both sides of it. We don't have long to find out which is crazy and exciting and terrifying all at the same time.

We went to a 6 week long birthing class that actually didn't terrify me as much as I thought it would so that was a good thing! I feel mildly prepared for what's about to happen to me-at least I'll be able to follow along when the midwives tell me what's going on.  And we've lots of techniques for laboring at home to deal with it all. Lots of prayers for an easy and quick labor and delivery are always welcomed ;)

The last thing that's been going on around here is that I've developed pregnancy induced carpal tunnel syndrome.  Yea, that's a thing. Apparently 25% of preggos get it.  This is not a club I want to be part of.  Now, I'm not complaining. Really I'm not. It took about 34 weeks for any sort of "issues" to pop up so I count myself lucky that this is it really. But just for a second, imagine that your middle fingers have fallen asleep. You know, the numbness and tinglies.  Now picture that all day, every day, for the last 3-4 weeks. Mix in other fingers and whole hand numbness at times, especially at night when you're trying to sleep and can't because it's migrated up to your elbow or shoulder and you've got fingers that have completely locked up. And you can't take anything but Tylenol (that doesn't work) and the only mild relief is icing your wrists. That's a glimpse of what's been going on.  The hardest part is I've had a hard time doing pony chores.  Heck, anything that requires my hands has been tough.   So life is changing a little bit already.  The big joke around here is that the Lord is preparing me for an infant by waking me up every 2, 3, or 4 hours to have to either walk around for a few minutes to help the pain and/or ice my hands.  Again, I'm seriously not complaining. We keep finding the silver lining. It may be hard to see through tired, teary eyes but it's there.

The big take away from this is how AWESOME my hubby is.  Without complaint, he's picked up my pony chore slack (which has been hard for me to accept).  Without me asking, he'll go out poo pick or feed or do any number of things that I need to do and tells me to go sit and ice. It's terribly humbling which I of course hate.  I think I've heard "shelve the pride and ask for help" more times that I can count the last few weeks. 

We also celebrated 7 glorious married years together.  We didn't do anything exciting but that's ok. We're getting ready for a baby-we needed to relax! I don't know how I got so lucky to have him but I am continually thankful for him.  I guess I just had awesome taste at 16 ;) I  mean look how cute we were:


April 14, 2015

Single Digits

So, we are now in the single digits for our baby countdown.







We are just over 9 weeks out from Critter's grand arrival into the world.  Thursday marks 31 weeks knocked up. AHHHH! That's so soon!!




Thankfully,  because I like to be prepared well in advanced, the baby's room is mostly finished.  We've got some finishing touches to do but overall, the room is almost ready to have a baby in it. 




There are some significant factors to being in the single digits apparently.  At this point, if the baby were to come, it would have a 90% chance of survival.  Yes, it would need to be in NICU for a bit probably, and, there could be some slight complications, but it would be alive and could have a thriving life.   We are still going to the midwife every 2 weeks at this point but in just a few short weeks it will be every week for a check to make sure all is in order. And apparently, although I don't think there is much medical evidence for this thought, once you hit the single digits that means it's time to get HUGE and tired!  Kid you not-last night after a very full day, I completely zonked out on the couch at 8:30 and, when I trundled to bed a little later, I was out until 8 this morning. Phew! I must have been tired!!   That part is medically backed-it's time to get tired again. But the exponential growth of baby and belly may not be :/ 


At my sis-in-law's baby shower over the weekend there was much broo ha-ha over the fact that they don't know the gender of the baby.  Matt and I are in the same boat but you know what? It's only increasing the excitement and anticipation of both arrivals. Sarah only has a few more weeks until their little one comes and I for one am DYING to know what that kid is! I've said all along I strongly believe one of us is having a boy and one a girl but it flip flops as to who is having what. One day it's us who is having the boy but then the next day it can be them.  All too soon we shall see if I'm right!


I'm more interested in hearing that they're going to name their kiddo.  I have this weird and irrational fear that we have the same top name picked out for our kids and that if we have the same gender,  Matt and I will have to settle for another name.  I wouldn't put it past us that out of the, literally, millions of names out there, we could choose the same ones now.  Everyone was glad when Benjamin was born because we all liked that name.  I think Matt actually said to me something along the lines of "well there goes a possibility for us." So in some respects I'm more anxious for them to have their baby so I can know the same so I can know if we're in the clear for our name choices.  This is also a reason why I've insisted on having 2 names picked out for each gender. Now if we could only agree on which one is the top choice!



April 3, 2015

A New Appreciation

So I'm going to get a little serious here. I know, shocker! Just wanted to warn you all....


Critter wasn't too active the last few days. I have a slight cold and I'm not the best about making sure I'm eating and drinking enough water.   Add that to the fact we're 29 weeks and that makes it kind of a perfect storm of inactive baby, apparently.  With less room to wiggle around, babies aren't necessarily as active as they were in the weeks leading up.  And with Critter being a less active baby anyway, even less activity can be slightly alarming. 


I noticed it Wednesday.  Usually I'm up and about so much that Critter is kind of lulled by my activity so they aren't as wiggly. But as soon as I sit down, take a break and eat something, whoop whoop party time!! However, that wasn't working Wednesday. Granted I was pretty stuffy and coughing some so my body may have been just trying to reboot in the time I did rest.  And my evening usually ends with couch time and a nice bowl of ice cream, usually some kind of chocolate variety.  This is when Critter really gets going-they must love the chocolate!! But this night, not even a blip. No nudges, hiccups (which I still have yet to feel), kicks, or elbows.  Nada. I didn't think too much of it but it was in the back of my mind.


You know how a few weeks ago I posted about kicking, those lovely 4 am jam sessions? Well, it didn't happen Wednesday night/Thursday morning. Now I know you're going to say I am overreacting. Let me finish first! I woke up around 330-4 am to utilize the facilities (I'm trying to be delicate here ;) ) and noticed that Critter was quiet. Too quiet. So I drank some water and laid on my left side. Nothing. I squished my belly. Almost laid onto my stomach to squish the babe even more. Nothing. Usually if I lay too far onto my side, Critter gets mad and starts to wiggle and kick big time. This time, not even a blip really. Ok, now we all know I'm not one to overreact and get worried about things easily. There are times I probably should get more concerned than I do.  So I feel it is legit when I get worried. 


I started to pray. God, please make Critter move. Just a little? Ok, I lied.  A big whopper of a kick. One? Please? Let me know this kid is still alive in there. I'm really starting to worry. I've read about people losing their babies at this point, please don't do that to me. I don't think I could take it... (as you can tell, I went down the rabbit hole a little bit here).


Then....wiggle wiggle. Just a little bit. But enough for relief, at that moment.


Thursday was a big day.  I have been giving some lessons to some girls who's parents we are friends with.  I decided since it is spring break to do a mini pony camp. So that meant up a little earlier than normal and in constant motion for about 6 hours.  I tried to make sure I was drinking enough water again.  But I still didn't feel anything.  Not from the time I got up to the time I sat down about 7 hours later for a real lunch and rest.  I ate some healthy good stuff but I also had a little chocolate, hoping that would help out.  Nope. So I call Matt, just to give him a heads up.  He texts back about 10 minutes later, asking me to call the midwife.  Now he's worried. And it takes A LOT for this guy to get nervous.  So like any good wife, I call.  They ask me to drop everything and do the kick test again. If it comes out low, time to go into labor and delivery for monitoring.  *Sidebar-they did say by having a front lying placenta (TMI I know) it is possible the baby is doing a lot but since I've got such a big cushion there, it may be hard to tell what's going on.  I had also thought of this so that's why I wasn't totally freaking, yet.  They also said that between 29-34 weeks they get more complaints from patients saying they aren't feeling as much from the baby so it could be normal still.  Again, I thought the same.


As I'm speaking with the nurse on the phone Matt comes home.  So he sits there with me and we do the kick count together.  For those who don't know what a kick count is, it's when you eat and drink a little something, lay on your left side, and count how many times the baby moves.  You should get 8-10 movements (which can me kick, punch, hiccups, topsy-turvey, squirms, and wiggles) within 2 hours.  I had already done a count before Matt got home and I had only gotten 5 in 2 hours. So with Matt sitting there, on the clock, and us chatting, it took about 45 minutes to get 8 kicks. Good enough right, since we had the excavator coming to talk about the arena.


Fast forward to after dinner, Matt and I are having a discussion (aka, slight disagreement, aka, argument.)  I shower and am a little upset. He then asks, how's the baby doing? Is it moving more? As a matter of fact, yes, yes it is. Apparently our baby hates it when I'm upset. Because it was going CRAZY! A hearty night's sleep was interrupted at times by Critter reminding me that they are still here and very well.  Thank the Lord!


This morning I woke up to so much activity and you know what, I was so glad! It hasn't been a secret that I wasn't looking forward to the kicking and moving side of being pregnant.  I worried it would freak me out, all the time.  And up until now, I was just dealt with it as part of the package.  Sometimes it hurt.  But mostly, it was just there.  Now, I am actually looking forward to it.  I like to think that Critter is chatting with me at times.  They are reminding me (and the Lord is too) that they are here and I'm to care for them.  Not that I didn't care before but I would just think it'll all be over once they come out.  Now, I actually may let someone else touch me when they get kicking! Shocker! I did say maybe so don't get too excited. Like I've said before, even at this point Matt doesn't get to feel much because the baby stops as soon as someone else comes near me.  I think they may be a little shy like I was when I was little.  Or more introverted like their daddy-he's hoping for that one!


So for now, I will revel in the movements. I will praise God that He is keeping Critter alive and well.  I will not complain when the baby moves so much it keeps me awake.  I will be grateful and thankful that I actually get to experience it all, when I know so many who would kill to have the chance. But I probably won't stand around stroking my belly and cooing over it. There is a limit you know?! 

March 26, 2015

28 weeks

So today is a big day-we are now in the third trimester of baking Critter.  Yes, in 3 short months, we will have a human baby to care for.




Don't worry. As you can tell, that thought BLOWS MY MIND!!!!!  Now I'm already feeling as big as the house that killed Dorothy, so I can only imagine how much larger I'm going to get. Word on the street is that the size of my belly is not very large in comparison to others who are at the same junction as I.  Whatever.  My stomach is bigger than it has ever been in my life.  And I look like an upside down turtle when I do certain poses in flow.  Mainly camel. In fact I actually look like a camel. It's ridiculous.

Thankfully the nursery is mostly completed and only has some finishing touches to be done.  We've had such an outpouring of generosity already from friends and family so that we don't need any "major" items.  Car seat and stroller were the only "big" things on our registry because we were given everything else.  I am so incredibly thankful and humbled by those in our life who said "what do you need, we've got tons to give you!"  Who does that? And we're not fancy folks by any means so hand-me-downs are totally cool in our book! But the amount of stuff we've accumulated already is crazy! Why do babies need so much stuff?????

As Critter gets larger, the space in which they have to occupy is getting smaller. This means that I'm feeling a heck of a lot more than I was a few weeks ago.  Apparently this is a good thing.  And not only can I feel a lot more, other people can see it more easily, if they're looking that is. I've got some friends in Bible study who have been watching the belly for a few weeks to see any movement-no dice so far. I'm sure as we get closer to DDay they'll be able to see all the kicks and rollbacks that I'm feeling.  I just keep joking to pass the chocolate.......

March 20, 2015

SPRIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!

So the weather today WAS NOT reflective of what a big day was today.  It's the first day of SPRING!!!! Sunshine? Nope. Warm temps? Nadda. Flowers blooming? Not a chance.  Today was rainy and cold and yuck. But there is hope; because it's SPRING!!! Officially!! Yay! So in celebration of that fact, here is my favorite springy song from one of my favorite musicals.  The first part of the video is very reflective of what I felt like winter was. And then, the clouds part, the sun shines, and the birds chirp (one of my absolute favorite aspects of spring!!).  Without further adieu, "Spring, Spring, Spring"  from Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.  Which, if you haven't seen, you should. It's awesome.







March 17, 2015

Epiphany

So I had an epiphany the other day.  I know!! That means I have a brain and think about things. I can hardly believe it myself at times.  Now, I know you're going to laugh at my brilliant moment of thought. Picture this:


I'm in BodyFlow last Friday.  For those who don't know what that is, it is a class at the gym that is a combination of yoga, tai-chi, and Pilates-it's a good stretchy class. Anyway, at the end of every class there is about 10 minutes of relaxation and meditation.  It's pretty awesome-you get all stretched out then you just chill for a bit. A big part of this time is to let your thoughts kind of float around-in one side out the other. You're not supposed to think about what you've got going on or dwell on things.  Good luck on that one! I can turn my brain onto a low setting but completely off is not possible. A lot of the time I use this time to pray and ask the Lord what he has for me. So last Friday I'm sitting there, relaxed, maybe some would call it zen? I don't know but I'm feeling pretty good.  When it hits me.

I am going to be someone's mother.


Now I've known this for a while, I theory. Each "milestone" of the pregnancy has only proven to me that there is indeed a small person being created within.  First ultrasound-yup, a little bean there. First time hearing the heartbeat-160 beats of holy crap.  20 week ultrasound-there really is something in there! AND IT MOVES!! That one has been proven may times over by the whalloping my uterus has been getting lately. But for some reason, this hit me differently. I (and Matt too I suppose) am going to be responsible for another human being. They will call me mama. Or mommy. Or mom. Or hey you. I'm sure I'm going to be called lots of things in my life, hopefully mostly good but probably some bad in there too.

Having owned animals since I myself was in utero, I'm used to taking care of things. The only times in my entire life that I did not have a dog for a long period of time were my freshman year of college, but that changed as soon as I got back to UT for the summer, and when we left Joey behind our first 6 months in Cyprus.  That was brutal. BUT, I was helping at the riding stables so I was still caring for animals! See what I mean? This was another part of my epiphany:
 
I take care of others

Now I don't mean that in a some self-righteous sort of way. But I think about my days, past and present, and what have they mainly been filled with? Caring for something or someone other than myself. Sure taking care of the horses benefits me because then I can ride them.  But I also enjoy, for the most part (not in snow and cold!), taking care of them.  I love to groom, feed, and just hang out with them.  The dogs too.  They don't like to be brushed as much but to play with them is great fun! I take care of our home (albeit I'm not Suzy homemaker most of the time) and I take care of Matt (in the sense that I make him food and do his laundry and love him.)

So having a baby is just one step above that right? Or maybe 18 steps above. Constant 24/7 care will be needed for a significant amount of time, unlike the animals. I realize I can't stick Critter in a kennel, tell it to be quiet, and leave for a few hours. They'll have to be with one of us, at all times, for years.  Or with someone we can trust. It won't just be the two of us, it'll be the three.  2 adults and 1 child is what we'll say at restaurants in the very near future. Until they can go for a sleepover with someone, we'll won't be alone, FOR YEARS. As you can see, I'm freaking out, I mean, digressing.....

The funny thing is, moms to be apparently have different epiphanies at different times that, from the outside, people are saying, well, DUH!!!! I was telling someone (who is also preggo, due a little before me) about my thoughts and they said their's was the baby will have to come out at some point.  They said they were good with being pregnant, they are one who LOVES it and has already signed up for round two. But they hadn't really thought about the baby coming out, until recently. They are due in a little over a month. Part of me wanted to go:



But that wouldn't have been fair by any means. I mean, I've just realized that I'm going to be a mother. Please see above image for an appropriate reaction.

God Bless Matt. His response to me coming home and having a mini tirade on him was, "We're going to be great parents. Don't worry-it's going to be fine." I have NO doubts that he's going to own it as a dad.  He'll be the perfect mixture of love, aloofness, protection, freedom, and guidance. Me, on the other hand. I shutter to think.  I feel like I will vacillate between super happy and uncontrollable crying/rage for quite some time. Here is your visual:



and

and

DISCLAIMER: I know this is Kim Kardashian but I feel that she is who I actually most look like when I'm crying-I was going for realism in this one.  Normally I would NEVER NEVER NEVER use a photo of one of them on my blog. But it just made me laugh. 

At the end of it all, I know we'll be ok. The Lord will guide us and we have so much love and support around us now that I think we'll be ok.  This is a time in which I think it's a good thing that most of our family is 10 minutes away-if I call and all you hear is screeching, come quickly.